Five steps from profile to first date
Signing up to a dating site can feel like a lot of forms and not much point. We have tried to make Horsey Lover UK straightforward, so you spend less time setting up and more time talking to people who understand your life. Here is the whole process, start to finish.
Step 1: create your profile
Begin by choosing Signup Here. You will be asked for a few basics: whether you are a man or a woman, who you would like to meet, your date of birth, an email address and a password. You must be 18 or over.
Pick a display name that does not give away your full name or the name of your yard. Something light works well; plenty of riders use a nod to their horse, a favourite ride or a place they love. Then add a photo. A clear, recent picture of your face makes a profile far more approachable. Riding photos are welcome too, but people want to see you as well as your horse.
Step 2: add your horse, discipline and yard routine
Here is where Horsey Lover UK parts company with general apps. In your own words, tell people about your life with horses. You might write a few lines about:
- the horse or horses you ride, own, share or loan, and what they are like;
- whether you keep them at home or on DIY, part or full livery;
- what you enjoy: hacking, schooling, dressage, jumping, eventing, hunting, showing, driving, endurance or racing;
- how often you are at the yard and when your evenings and weekends are usually taken;
- what you do when you are not with horses: work, family, dogs, music, walking, the pub quiz.
A profile that mentions a lame horse's box rest or a weekend lost to a flooded arena feels real. You do not need to write an essay. A handful of true sentences will do more than a page of adjectives.
If you do not currently ride, say what draws you to horses. Perhaps you grew up with ponies, perhaps you love racing, perhaps you simply admire people who are up at dawn for an animal they adore. All of that is a good starting point.
Step 3: decide who you are looking for
Next, pick an age bracket and a search radius. Think realistically about distance. Rural roads, yard commitments and early starts can make a long drive hard to sustain. Some people search within half an hour of their yard; others are happy to cover a county or more. You can adjust this at any time.
It also helps to say on your profile what you are looking for. A fellow rider for long hacks and a shared lorry? Someone who does not ride but enjoys a day at the races? Friendship first, or a serious relationship? Nobody can read minds, and being clear attracts the people most likely to suit you.
Step 4: start chatting and arrange to meet
Browse profiles in your search area and message anyone who interests you. The best opening messages mention something specific from a profile. "Your cob sounds like he has a sense of humour, what has he done lately?" invites a story. "Hey" invites silence.
Let the conversation unfold however suits you both. Some people like to chat for a week or two; others are ready to meet after a few messages. Either is fine. When it feels right, suggest a first date somewhere public and easy to leave: a café in a market town, a country pub at lunchtime, a raceday or a county show. A yard visit can wait until you know each other better.
Step 5: stay safe when you meet
Before a first date, tell a friend where you are going and when you expect to be home. Arrange your own transport, which in the countryside may mean checking the last bus or arranging a lift. Keep your phone charged and know whether the venue has signal.
However heartfelt a match's story sounds, money should never change hands. That includes requests to help buy a horse, cover a vet bill or pay for transport to see you. Block and report anyone who asks. Our safety guide goes into more detail.
Upgrading
If you want more from the site, VIP and VIP Plus are there, each sold by the week, month, quarter, half year or year. The pricing page gives each figure in pounds and flags which plans renew. What each tier includes is shown before you pay.
Keeping your profile fresh
Horse life changes with the seasons and so do people. Update your profile when something big happens: a new horse, a move to a different yard, the end of the competition season or a change in what you are looking for. Swap in a new photo every few months. Small updates show that you are active and keep your profile accurate for anyone who reads it.
If you need a break, perhaps during foaling season or a busy spell at work, hide your profile rather than deleting it. When things settle down, bring it back.
A few habits that help
People who enjoy online dating tend to approach it in a relaxed way. They read profiles properly before messaging. They reply even when the answer is "no thanks", because it is kinder than silence. They do not take a slow reply personally; the other person may simply be mucking out with their phone in the car. And they treat a first date as a chance to meet someone interesting, not an audition for marriage.
None of this is complicated, and much of it will feel familiar to anyone who has spent time around a busy yard. Patience, good manners and a sense of humour go a long way with horses and with people.
What a good week on the site looks like
There is no correct way to use a dating site, but a few small routines help. Some riders check messages over a cup of tea after evening stables and reply to everyone who wrote that day. Others set aside Sunday evening to browse new profiles in their area. Either works, provided you stay consistent enough that conversations do not wither. If you go quiet for a fortnight because a horse is lame or work is frantic, a short note explaining why keeps the door open.
Ready to begin
You now know how the site works. If you would like to read more first, the features page describes each tool, and our guides cover dating questions horse people often ask. Otherwise, Signup Here and start writing about your horse.